Thy Children Shall Never Fail To Please Thy
by umbreon101
Summary: A story, classic with Edward and Bella both human and married. Have four children. See inside for details. Rated T , may change as the story goes on. R&R for more chapters, please! Second story.
1. Chapter 1

_Thy Children Shall Never Fail To Please Thy_

_By Umbreon_

_---_

_Character Cast:_

_Edward Cullen: Office CEO – Human – Male – 30_

_Isabella Swan Cullen: At-Home Writer – Human – Female – 29_

_Elizabeth Cullen: Child, wants to be a writer like her 'Mammy' – Human – Female – 6_

_Charles Swan Cullen: Child, wants to be a police officer to save people – Human – Male – 3_

_Lissy Swan: Child, wants to be a teacher to teach people – Human – Female – 2_

_Emmy Cullen: Child, wants to play – Human – Female – 8 months_

_---_

How could I have ever said 'life was easy'? It didn't seem so now. However, I was happy with the life I had, although there could never have been a happier time in my life than being with my Edward before we had any children. Oh those pleasure-high three years of fun and luxury, with no problem of having taking care of the kids.

Children gave me pleasure, no doubt. Elizabeth, whom we often called Eli, was a pure joy to have. She was an easy child to raise, never giving a loud cry, not even when her baby teeth were coming in. I have to say, she was my pride and joy. And still is. Eli wants to be a writer like me, and I have to say she is something that I am just happy to know about, and she loves to write as well. Charles, on the other hand, was rather… hard to have. He was constantly crying (and still is, mind me) and I never had spare time. Then, when Lissy was born, I had to take care of both Charles, who was called Char more often and Lissy, who was called Lis, together. When Charles was one. I can't say that that was a pleasant experience. They still aren't very quiet. Extremely loud, actually, but Emmy gave me a big break. She was another more quiet kid. Her facial expressions showed me what was wrong rather than making a huge fuss about it. Which, of course, just made me feel better about having kids. She's a pleasure to have, just like my Eli.

Nowadays, Eli is a little grownup. She helps me get things cleaned up, and is a big girl. Sometimes she even reads to her brothers and sisters! I'm just proud.

Thanks, Diary. Bella.

---

_The sun was shining, the day was bright. The Cullen family was just getting ready to go. "Hurry," Isabella Cullen ushered Elizabeth, who was struggling with her backpack. She gave up and Bella slipped it on her daughter's back. "Good luck, honey," she called out, equipping her daughter with a lunch bag and ten dollars as well. Edward was walking around, looking for his bag. Bella handed him it, and he left after kissing her cheek softly. He drove away in a whoosh of Volvo and exhaust. Taking a look outside, Elizabeth had gotten to the private car that drove down the block towards the school. It was a small Toyota Camry, and Elizabeth waved her mom goodbye for the day._

_---_

_BELLA'S POV_

After Elizabeth left with the driver, I smiled to myself. Today was the first day of Elizabeth starting first grade. I couldn't wait to see Eli's happy face when she came home, her face beaming as she inserted and filled me with all the information on her new teacher and how much she liked him or her.

Suddenly, I was jerked back into reality by Charles, screaming for me that he 'wet his panties'. I sighed. Charles was real cute when he was really not problematic, but when he was… that was scary and somewhat annoying at times. Who knew a kid could be so loud? Lissy shrieked as Charles passed, her eyes growing wide at his increasingly wet-looking pants. I scowled. "Charles, you must learn how to pee in the potty," I said, glowering at him.

"I sowwy, Mammy," he said quietly.

I quickly retaliated, getting his pants off, putting them in the washer and getting him some new pants as he sat patiently on the toilet, going potty. It was kind of empty though, since all he had was a little bit. He had emptied most of his 'potty' on his pants. When I finally got him the new pants, he was kind of bored. I was lucky that Lissy hadn't said anything yet, as well as Emmy. Just as I was thinking that, a new call aroused. All call that I knew. My Elizabeth.

---

**A/N:**

**Second story! Hope you enjoy. I think it's quite innovative, lol. Mammy and Daddy, as well as Eli, Char, Lis and Em. Emmy sounds like Emmett. xD But she's a girl, and not nearly as bulky as Emmett is. Now imaging that! *chuckles***

**Well, please rate and review, and tell me what you like!**

**Thanks.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Bella's POV**

"Elizabeth!"

"Mommy! Mommy! I fell off! Over the curb! The nurse said I had to come back!" Elizabeth's voice came over a short distance from me, and I was more and more worried about her. I couldn't quite comprehend the correct information, but I had the basics. She probably had fallen over a curb on the way to her school, and the nurse told her to come back home? There wasn't much sense in that, but I guessed that it worked whatsoever. At least I had the right materials in my house, which was helpful at times.

"Okay, come on in, honey," I said, ushering her in. Her knee was bandaged, but still bleeding profusely, I turned a blanchy color at all the blood. Rust... and salt. Ew. I still hadn't gotten over what had happened when I was in Biology in Forks High School, definitely not a good thing. But at least I'd gotten to know Edward.

She walked in carefully, as if trying not to let more blood flow. I took her to the bathroom and cleaned her cut with water quickly, making sure not to look at the blood. Then I selected some gauze and wrapped it around her leg where the slash was. It wasn't that bad, and it didn't look like it hurt as much.

"Thanks, mommy!" Elizabeth gingerly stood up and hugged me. "Now I get to stay home and help you again!!!" Her voice was high and cheery, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her. She always wanted to help me. Now that she was full-time in school, she was creeped out at the factor that there was no one there to help me. I didn't really need it, but she always assumed that I did.

"Okay, come on."

We walked towards the kitchen together.

**Edward's POV**

I was looking at a stack of papers indicating our bills when I heard a knock.

"Come on in," I called, turning my attention to the door.

Suddenly, the door burst open and Tanya came in, her hair all done up in curls and put up. I groaned inwardly. Tanya was always trying to seduce me; I had no idea why. She did know that I was married, and happily that too. Still, she came in once in a while and started making me feel like - just weird. She was overly

nice all times. Very annoying, I know. You would be like that as well if someone you had no interest in and _married_ as well kept coming around to try and make you like them. I never paid much attention to her unless she came too close, in which I just scooted away and glared at her. Or I just sent her away and tried to get back to my work.

"Oh _hello,_ Edward! So nice to see you!" She was _orange._ I halfway laughed, her face was orange colored. Probably a tan gone wrong. It was obvious that Tanya loved making her 'do's. Although I had no idea what other men saw in her.

"Hello."

"How is your marriage going?" She asked this question every single time.

"It's fine. Four kids." My answer was short and sweet.

Her face turned sour. "Oh, my. That's quite a bit. She can manage?"

"Of course!" I scoffed, turning away from her. "Now if that's all you have to say to me, I would like you to leave and get working on what I have assigned you to do before you decided to come in here to talk to me about my family _again._" I grimaced, and she left quickly, probably hoping I would call her back. No way. That was not going to happen anytime. Anytime.

---

**A/N:**

**I know it's short, but I didn't have enough time. Sorry. I promise at least two pages for the next chapter. ^^;**


	3. Authors Note

**A/N:**

**Sorry for the author's note. I hate these things, but sometimes they just have to happen. I might update One Hundred Years Later and Unnamed at times, but I really am pretty sick these days.**

**So I'm posting this in all of my stories.**

**I am also posting a challenge for those who like. It's on my profile. Well, going to be, anyway. Harry Potter x Twilight Crossover. You'll get more info later. I can't do this because I haven't read the series, but it seems like a pretty decent idea. I'd really like to see someone's viewpoint on how the Cullens (yes, vampires) will do at magic. And Bella. Clumsy old Bella… *sighs fondly***

**That's all. Thanks for the support!**


	4. Chapter 3

Bella POV

----

When Edward _finally_ got home, I had the odd thought of wanting to strangle him. I suppose it wasn't that odd though, because I had just gotten Eli to sleep. She was sleeping, napping really, because I was officially worn out.

"Edward, today was definitely not what the first day of school for Eli was supposed to be like," I said, running a hand through my messy hair. I hadn't even got to write a few pages of work today, because Eli had been so intimidating and loud. Usually she was quiet, but I guess wounds weren't helpful.

"I know, honey. I had a bad day too, what with Tanya coming, _despite_ knowing that I'm happily married." He glowered at the wall across from him. "So…" he changed the subject. "How are Char, Lis and Em?"

I sighed. "They're fine. Char tried to eat a pen today though." I shook my head. "I don't get how many times he's going to do that before he finally realizes that pens are not… chewable."

"Lis is really pretty good, she just played with her toys today. Thank goodness. And Em is fine. She can't do much, being little and all. But I'm afraid once she gets older that won't be the case."

"I'm going to go check on Eli," I told him, kissed him briefly, then turned towards the door of Eli's room to make sure she was fine.

"Elizabeth?"

She murmured in her sleep, something that she had inherited from me. Today she was whispering 'hurt' 'hot' and a 'sick' that I didn't understand.

I picked touched her forehead, then winced. She was hot. Oh. O_h_. She had a fever. Or a cold. Or the flu. I was freaked out, to say the least.

"Eli, come on, wake up honey. You have to eat something, then take the medication. Edward!"

Eli woke up, rubbing her eyes as Edward charged into the room.

"What is it, Bella?" He looked around.

"Eli's got a fever again! Or the flu again, or the cold again!" I shivered. The last few times that had happened, it wasn't so good. We had found out before when Char was about one year old, and that hadn't been helpful, as well as Eli getting sick when she was two, three and five. I was lucky at least that our children usually didn't get sick as often as most did. Luckily enough, Lis and Em hadn't even had anything wrong with them – not yet, anyway.

"It's okay Bella, come on, we'll get Eli some Tylenol, crackers, water and she'll be fine." He said to me, and muttered under his breath, "Where is that Tylenol, anyway…?"

I scampered out, to leave Edward with Eli to keep her quiet and calm, and not hot, while I looked for the medicine. I rummaged through the cabinets of our bathrooms, because we had three. Actually, we had four bedrooms, technically two and a half bathrooms, one study, a living room, family room, a huge eat-in kitchen, a foyer, a game room and a basement that was the size of an elephant. Never-mind that, probably two or three elephants. All in all, we had quite the big house because of Edward's job as CEO. I also had quite a bit of money saved up, and a huge inheritance from my grandfather, so we split the house between us half and half with plenty of money to spare on either side.

"Shit!" I murmured to myself. "Can't find the Tylenol, Edward!" I called to him. "I'm going to visit the shops!" I groaned inwardly. The only shop that would be open now at about 10:30 pm would be maybe Wal-Mart. Oh well.

I grabbed my purse, my fleece winter jacket, got my boots on, and ran to the garage of the house. We had two cars, one for Edward and one for my daily errands. Edward's was a shiny silver Volvo (I couldn't resist, hehe.) and mine a creamy colored McLaren F1. It was a McLaren if you didn't speak Car and Driver, but I called him my MaL. It was weird, but it worked.

I pushed the gas pedal and I was off. It sped up to about 60 miles per hour, since this was no highway. I grimaced. I hated parking MaL in Wal-Mart's parking lot. It was just so _dirty…_

When I finally got to the supermarket, I rushed in and power walked to the pharmacy area. I scanned the shelves hurriedly, looking for Tylenol.

"Do you need anything?" I looked up to see a teenager, about 20 years old perhaps, with a mousy mop of blonde hair that was nothing like Edward's and blue eyes. He had freckles, and he looked very… not what I liked.

"No thank you."

"My name's Mike."

"Okay. Now I'm looking for Tylenol." I thought that if someone was here, I might as well make use of him. What was the point of _not _doing so?

"Right there, Ms…?"

"I'm a _Mrs._ Cullen," I said, making sure to accentuate the Mrs. well.

"Married already?" He looked surprised. Oh, he wanted to date me? No chance. I had my Edward.

"Yes. Now if you'll excuse me…"

I made my way away from the boy that seemed to want a whole lot of my attention that I couldn't and wouldn't give, checked out and drove home quickly.

"Edward, honey, I'm back," I called out, and he came down, looking worried.

"I took her temperature. It's 103.6, and if she doesn't get better, I'm going to call the doctor."

I smiled in what I hoped was a reassuring manner, although inside I was reeling. One hundred _three_ point six! "Don't worry, once we get her some of this – I pointed at the Wal-mart bag I was holding – she'll be fine."

"I sure hope so," he said, as I walked into the kitchen to get some crackers and water for Eli as he went upstairs to check on her.

I walked up the stairs and went into Eli's bedroom. It was a lilac purple with flowers on the top as borderlines.

"Come on Eli, eat some crackers. Then your stomach won't feel bad after drinking the Tylenol," I persuaded her as she took some with her small fingers and chomped down on the crackers.

"Now, some Tylenol…" I said, and gave her the small cup almost half full. I had the cup of water with me as well, much bigger than the Tylenol cup just in case she needed the water for the taste.

She made a face, then bravely swallowed all of the medicine and quickly grabbed the cup and swallowed.

I knew how it felt; I had never liked Tylenol either.

"Okay Eli, now I just need you to try and keep the medicine down and go to sleep honey," I told her soothingly.

"Thank you Mommy," she said, already drifting off to sleep.

---

"Wake up, Eli!" I called to her, turning on her bedroom lights. "Are you okay?"

She murmured in her sleep again as I felt her forehead. I sighed… it was still pretty hot.

"Edward honey, Eli's going to have to stay home with me today."

He sighed audibly. "Okay Bells, but I have to say, good luck with her." I grimaced.

"Well, I guess, since there's not much else, how do I look?" I chuckled. Edward was always very forward with asking about how he looked; it was important to his job.

He looked amusedly at me. "Something wrong my dear?"

"Nothing, nothing…" I said, still chortling.

"Okay, lets see…" I said. He was dressed in one of those suits for formal events, which was what he normally wore. Black today; because he had a conference, with a dark blue striped tie. His hair was in his normal tousled style, emerald green eyes shining with amusement.

"Looks good."

"You now, honey. You look beautiful…"

"As usual. Yes, I know, Edward." I smiled. He always said that. I was wearing a sub knit top, tie dyed colors on it with black yoga pants and a pair of slippers. Definitely not the best throw-together, but hey, I was staying home with my sick daughter. Who cared how you looked?

I rolled my eyes at him, then pushed him out of the house. Literally. When I finally got him out, I sighed. Another day of being stuck at home with the kids.

I got over it and called the babysitter. She was a very nice girl named Angela, only a year or so younger than me.

"Can you come over, Angela? I need to go to one of my you know, author meeting kind of things. Signing is today for _Way to Fly_, you know that, right?"

"_I know, Bells. I'm coming. I'll be there in five, gotcha?"_

"Thanks, Angie, see you!"

I put the telephone down and sighed. Time to get dressed.

I kept the sub knit top on, but changed my pants into a square denim miniskirt. It wasn't that short, but it fit snugly. I slipped into my brass peace flats to match my top and got my hoop earrings and my clutch together, and stepped outside.

When I saw Angela's Honda pull up, I smiled and waved.

"Hey Angie!" I called out, grinning.

She stepped out. Angela had been my friend for a long time, even when I was in elementary school.

"Hey Bells, you better get going. It's like," she checked her watch. "Seven fifteen. You have about fifteen minutes to get to the bookstore, but with your speed, you'll get there in five minutes, hell."

"I know, Angie, I know. I'm going…"

She glowered. "Hurry _up_!"

I scampered off to my MaL, and drove out to the bookstore to only to greet the mobs that would surely stampede me…

---

**A/N: Long enough? I **_**hope…**_** *sigh*. Oh well. I've been really tired these days. Lots of homework.**


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